


Sunshine

by DanieXJ



Series: Mardi Gras [1]
Category: ER
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-20
Updated: 2009-03-20
Packaged: 2017-11-20 10:06:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/584183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanieXJ/pseuds/DanieXJ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's 2 Years after "Rampage" and Kerry and Kim meet again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Rewrite of my two stories, "Disney Insanity" and "You are My Sunshine". I don't know why I'm doing it, except, for about eight years or so, the stories in the Mardi Gras Series just… didn't feel right.
> 
> I'm setting it during season 9, at least in regards to facts like, Greene is dead, Peter isn't there, Abby is still a nurse, barely, etc. Though I have changed some stuff too. (An example being, Romano is still has both arms. No helicopter...)

"What the hell is up with sour puss over there?"

Randi didn't even look up to see who Dave was referring to. "I dare you to say that to her face."

Dave chuckled, "No, I value my life as well as my Chief Resident position. Really, what's up with the Chief?"

Randi finally looked up from the computer screen. "You really haven't noticed. It isn't just the last few days, or last few weeks, she's been bummin' for almost two years Dave."

Dave looked up at the redheaded doctor with the crutch. "Two years, why?"

Randi shrugged as Kerry approached the desk. "Double trauma coming in."

Dave blinked, "How do you know?"

Randi answered for Kerry, "It's called a radio Dave."

"Ah, right... I'll... I'll go wait for 'em."

Kerry stood across from the ER clerk and finished up her chart. Randi had stopped working and stared at Kerry. "Doctor Weaver, are you okay?"

Kerry stuffed the chart in the rack. "I'm fine Randi. Did you get the schedule I emailed you? Put it up on the Intranet?"

Randi nodded, "Yes, yes."

Kerry nodded back and turned as she heard the ambulances roar into the bay. "Good, thank you. Let's go see what Doris and her newbie Carlos has for us."

Kerry walked off to meet the injured and Randi shook her head, "No problem."


	2. Chapter One

"Why are you dragging me back here Maggie?" They climbed down the EL steps side by side. Kim was whipcord tense at just the sight of the County General building. "Is there a specific reason why we're here?"

They kept walking and Maggie kept ignoring Kim's questions. After she'd been fired by Romano in May 2001 she'd been hired by a private practice in Chicago that a couple of her Psychologist friends had started. She told herself that she never ventured near County because she didn't want to run into the great bald turd in charge of the place, but in her heart, the part that she tried very hard to pretend didn't exist, she couldn't bear the thought of running into a short, redheaded doctor who used a crutch.

Then, a year before, Maggie, Abby's mother, had gotten referred to Kim.

She didn't think of it as trouble, Maggie seemed to thrive when she was Kim's patient, and then Maggie had asked for a favor, assured Kim that it was for charity. Kim had finally given in, but she was regretting that fact.

Maggie didn't even pause as she led Kim through the ER. "Almost there Kim. Don't split in half or spontaneously combust or anything..." 

"Ha, funny."

Maggie stopped so suddenly that Kim bumped into the older woman's back. "Please listen to everything I have to say first?"

Kim frowned, but finally nodded, "I will listen. I'm very good at listening." Maggie laughed and resumed her walk towards the lounge. She plowed right in when she got to the Lounge door, surprising both people inside as well as Kim. 

Kim took a couple of slow, cleansing breaths as she stood across the room from the two familiar women. Abby was on one side. Nothing much had changed about her appearance, though she didn't look like she wanted to throttle her mother as much. On the other hand, Kerry, who sat next to her, looked ten years older than she had the last time Kim had seen her.

They both looked up as Maggie charged into the room. Abby shot her mother a look, "Mother, you're late."

Maggie put her hands on her hips, "I brought Kim with me, that's why we're late, and it's not as if you could start without me."

Kerry closed her eyes for a moment and then spoke, "You two, stop. I agreed to do this as a favor to Gabe. That is the only reason that I'm sitting in this room. If you two want to bicker like children, do it when I don't have to be in your presence. Okay?" 

Both women nodded and Kerry finally met Kim's eyes. "Doctor Legaspi. Now, could we get to it?"

Maggie looked from Kerry to Abby and back to Kerry. She sighed and sat. Kim also sat and folder her arms across her chest. Maggie started. "Kim, I would like you to be the... for lack of a better title, Prop Mistress of our little production."

"What are you doing?"

Maggie smiled, "Beauty and the Beast."

Kim opened her mouth to give a snarky remark, but changed her mind before the words escaped. She slowed her brain down and spoke, "So, what has Maggie cajoled you two into?"

Abby sighed, "I'm going to be the Feather duster, Mother is Mrs. Potts." Abby shot her mother a look Kim couldn't quite decipher. "Gallant, Michael Gallant, you probably don't know him, he's new since you left. He's playing Gaston. Doctor Anspaugh is playing Maurice. Malucci." Abby smiled, "Malucci is playing LeFou, and... and Randi is playing Belle."

Kim coughed, "Rand... Belle?"

From the hall came a decidedly Croatian voice speaking rather sternly, "Abby."

Abby smiled and quickly got up, "I'd better go explain about Lumiere... and... everything..." She dashed out the door to intercept Luka.

Maggie glanced around the room quickly, never meeting either Kim or Kerry's gazes. Then with a smile said, "I think that I'll join my daughter in the explanations," and she was out the door in a second.

Kim raised an eyebrow at Maggie's hasty retreat. She looked across the table at Kerry. "So, how did they drag you into this?"

Kerry closed her eyes for a moment and then slowly opened them and answered, "Truthfully?"

"Always."

"It wasn't Gabe, but Robert who... suggested that I should help." Kerry spoke Robert Romano's name with such venom that Kim knew that something had gone down after her own firing. The psychiatrist didn't broach the subject though, it didn't feel like the time. Kerry continued, "I'm the Stage Manager, I have no idea why."

Kim practically bit her tongue in half trying to control what came out of her mouth. She wound up with a sore tongue, "Because you're brilliant Kerry." Kim mentally slapped her head in frustration. "I'm sorry, I didn't... it's true, but I shouldn't have said that. We haven't talked in two years, and the last time we did... I'm sorry."

Kerry looked down, "So, you're still quite the flirt?" Kim blinked in confusion until Kerry raised her head, there was quite a sparkle in them.

Dave took that moment to make his grand entrance and then stopped dead in his tracks. "Doctor Legs, Legaspi." He looked back and forth between Kerry and Kim quickly. Then, regaining his composure too quickly for his own good, chuckled. "Shouldn't you two be fightin' it out WWE style?"

Kerry's head swiveled slowly towards Dave, who had shut up when he saw Kerry's head start to move. "Malucci, if you know what's good for your career, life and organs, go stand in front of that big chart that hangs over the admit desk and at least look like you're doing your job. Got it?"

Dave plastered a smile on his face, nodded and slipped out the room backwards without another word. Kim collapsed in laughter. Kerry simply waited her outburst out, then added to Kim's amusement. "Just wait until he figures out what LeFou means in French." She paused, "He really has gotten better, otherwise, I wouldn't have made him Chief Resident. I think he likes to think that clashing with me, or being the funny one makes him unique and edgy or something. He has a kid you know, a little boy."

"What?" Kerry just nodded. Kim shook her head in surprise, and decided it was time for a change of subject. "Do you think they did this on purpose?"

Kerry nodded. "Yep, Randi's been inquiring for months after my state of mind."

Kim pursed her lips, "Should we fall for it?"

Kerry shrugged, "It is for charity, up to you, can you deal with me giving you orders, I know that..." Kerry trailed off.

Kim took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, their shared past, as short as it had been, less than six months, hung between them like a thick comforter. "I have never done anything like this before."

"Really?" Kerry was surprised, "I would have thought..." She trailed off again.

Kim smiled sheepishly, "Yeah, you mean, you're gay, why weren't you hangin' out with all the other freaks and geeks? I was cool, what can I say, it was a curse. I went out with a couple of the girls in the drama club, an actress and the make-up guru I think, but I was more into sports and uh... being cool."

Kerry bit her lip, "Ah, you were... that girl."

"Which girl?"

Kerry sighed, "The one who was cool, totally at ease with herself, not to mention helpful, smart, and nice to all strata of school society, even the nerds, geeks, and freaks."

"Guilty I guess. Kerry..."

Kerry shook her head, putting off Kim's question, whatever it was going to be. "I'm... Abby knows about what... we went through and... and Romano, I sort of threatened him in the Men's lavatory, so he knows."

Kim stared at Kerry for a long moment and then changed the subject again, "I think I'll do it. Even if you're the one givin' me the orders."

Maggie chose that moment to whirl back into the room. She was followed shortly by the still arguing Luka and Abby. Luka was proclaiming very vehemently, "I will not wear this costume, it is a candlestick."

Abby hurfed, "Hey, I'm the Feather duster which isn't exactly a pair of pants and a shirt. Look, it could be worse, you could have to wear mother's costume. Right Maggie?"

Maggie didn't bat an eye, "You are very right Abby, but if it is the price I have to pay to direct this little performance I don't mind. Luka, let's talk some more about this costume."

As they walked back out of the lounge Abby sat back down, wearily. Kerry's head snapped up. She spoke loudly at Luka's back, "See some patients while you're at it." She sighed and stood. "I should probably go and make sure that Malucci hasn't gotten us sued, or that our new EMT isn't stealing coffee, or supplies, or picking up women or something. Abby, you can tell your mother that I'll stage manage." She turned to Kim, "It was... nice... to see you Doc... Kim."

Kim smiled, "Ditto." A small, almost minuscule smile came to Kerry's face and she shook her head in silence as she crutched out of the lounge. Abby raised her eyebrows at the exchange. Kim smiled, "It's a long story. Are you on now?"

Abby shook her head, "Nope, just have to wait for my mother. She says that you're a great help to her and... this past year are the best she's had in a long while."

"You know that it's my job, but I am glad that I've been able to help." They lapsed into an uncomfortable silence. "Abby, did she tell you, or did you guess that we had gone out, that we had broken up?"

Abby shrugged, "I guessed. Romano knows, and Randi knows too."

"Randi knows, and yet the entire hospital doesn't?"

"Hey..." Abby shook a finger at Kim. "You know that Randi and Kerry have this... weird bond, I guess the closest analogy would be friendship. Truthfully, if anyone would know how Kerry's really doing it would be her. All I know is that lately she looks as old as dirt, and sometimes, she doesn't even look to be enjoying working anymore."

Kim sighed, "She's always had work, even when everything else was imploding... Randi huh..." Abby nodded as they both stood. "It was good to see you Abby, and tell Maggie that I'll prop up whatever I can, but you may want to warn her, I've never done anything in any theater group, ever, so, if I suck, not my fault."

oOOOOo

"Okay, what's the ulterior motive Doctor Legaspi?"

"Please, I plan to grill you for info, so it's Kim."

They sat outside. Water in front of them, every once in a while someone would stroll by, but for the most part Randi and Kim were alone on their park bench. "Grill me about Kerry?"

"She looks like hell."

Randi sighed, "She thinks she's in hell. She's cut herself off from her friends, most of them are very worried about her. She's still great with most of her patients, every once in a while she'll deal with a Pedes case and a smile will actually be on her face for more than a second. With us, the Emergency Department, the entire hospital, she's the same. It just seems like her world has narrowed to work for her. I'm no Psychologist, but that doesn't seem healthy. Have you really been in Chicago all this time?"

Kim nodded, "I have."

"You doin' okay?"

Kim gave Randi a look, "Randi, I don't need any help with my love life, so don't get any ideas."

"Who me? Seriously..."

Kim shook her head and stared out over the water. "Yes, I am fine. Helpin' people, makin' money, no one is shooting at me, and I don't have a homophobic boss."

"What." Randi gave Kim a push, "No dish... there's a new Morgue Resident who's..."

Kim pushed Randi back, "I know, Dolly, nice."

Randi rolled her eyes, "Good to know some things never change."

Kim stood and walked towards the railing. "So, Belle huh?"

Randi joined Kim at the railing with a groan. "I only agreed to it if Maggie would ask Kerry, Doctor Weaver to be a part of the production as well."

Kim shook her head again, "Did you tell Maggie to get me on board?"

Randi smirked, "Actually, she thought of that herself."

"Will I fall for it?"

Randi faced Kim, "You should. I know people who know you, and you haven't had one of your disastrous relationships with a straight woman since you and Kerry broke up. One night stands, two week relationships, sure, but nothing that matters."

"Randi..." Kim practically hurfed the name out, "Why the hell do you care?"

Randi shrugged, "Because when you and she were going out, despite the fact that no one knew the reason, she was human, and that's good for her, but more importantly, it's really, really good for us."

Kim pushed away from the railing. "I should get going."

Randi took a hold of Kim's arm before she could get too far away, "Uh uh, first you have to come back with me."

"Randi."

Randi started dragging Kim back towards County. "C'mon Kim, you know you miss us. What kind of crazies do you really get in private practice? Do people set themselves on fire, need popsicle enemas. Do you get to take someone who has no hope, no job, no sanity, no nothing and see their first transition back to being a full person. And, c'mon, didn't you hear about the randy opossum?"

Kim groaned, "Furries convention right?"

"Tola left."

"What?"

"No, who... Doctor Tola, the one who replaced you. He was fine, but not you."

Kim shook her head, "I can't Randi."

oOOOOo

Kerry made her way to the admit desk and she found Dave singing some song that she didn't immediately recognize. He was, of course, the first to see her. "Hey Chief, join me on the chorus."

Kerry closed her eyes, "David, you want sunshine, I'll give you a big dose of sunshine right before I put it where the sun... don't shine..."

Dave was suddenly in motion and talking at the same time, "Chief, do you want me to take the... or maybe... I'll be in Curtain one."

Chuny chuckled a bit too loudly and Kerry drilled two holes into the nurse's forehead. Chuny held up her hands, "I'm just standing here."

"And you don't see a problem with that?" Kerry raised her eyebrows and Chuny left the admit desk area. Kerry took a look at the mostly clear board and grabbed a chart from the rack. An unknown knee problem.

When Kerry walked in she did not see the problem, there were two women and a child in the room and none of them seemed to be in much pain. Not to mention, none of them were on the exam table. "Ms. Sarah Jones?"

The woman sitting in the chair raised her hand as if class. "That would be me. Kaylee here wants me to get this checked out. I slipped in a puddle and did sort of a... a split. I don't think anything is broken, but you never know, and generally Kay is right. I can't be hurt, I have a game this week."

Kerry motioned towards the bed in the middle of the room. "If there's nothing wrong then this will be short." Sarah sighed and with the little girl and Kaylee's help, hopped over to the bed. "Have, you had any prior injuries to this knee or leg?" She slowly and methodically put Sarah's right knee through a battery of simple tests to gauge its stability and mobility. "And did you hear or feel any pops, when it happened?"

Sarah laughed and then saw Kerry's face. "Oh, you're serious. Yes, I've sprained it not to mention I've knocked the kneecap out of place more times than I can count. I'm a goalie so both knees tend to get tossed around a bit. Have you heard of the Chicago Politicos? We never lose, ever..."

Kerry shook her head negatively as she wrote some in Sarah's chart. "Nope, club team?"

Sarah smiled, "No, a semi-semi-semi-semi-semi amateur soccer team. Just a bunch of women having fun. How long has it been going on for Kay?"

At that point the little girl piped up, "Three years Momma, 'cause you said I was three when you won the champin... championship."

Sarah smiled, "That's right Corey."

Finally Kerry looked up from the chart. "I want to get an x-ray, make sure that you don't have any broken bones. But, if everything checks out, I can let you go. You should really get it checked by your own doctor though, maybe an Orthopedist. You don't want to suffer an injury that's worse than a strained knee."

Sarah nodded seriously as she got down off the table. Kerry turned to the open door. "Yosh." Yosh came in, pushing a wheel chair. "Don't put weight on it for the moment." Sarah nodded and sat in the chair. Without waiting for the nurse she rolled out, followed by Kaylee and Corey. Kerry was left alone in the room with Yosh. "Looking for brownie points Yosh?"

Yosh just smiled to himself and jogged to catch up with Sarah. Kerry went by the admit desk and dropped off the chart. She was surprised when she saw that the board was still clear. She, of course, had her never-ending paperwork until the X-rays came back.

oOOOOo

She'd made quite a dent in the pile when Kim walked into the lounge. "You know Ker, you should really get an office."

Kerry shrugged, "I'm a doctor, not an administrator, or at least I pretend that's true. What are you doing back?"

Kim crossed her arms over her chest, "Trying to find Maggie."

"I think she and Abby went home."

Kim shook her head with a wry smile, "Of course they did."

She turned and was nearly out the door when Kerry spoke again, "Have you ever heard of the Chicago Politicos?"

Kim chuckled, but Kerry didn't look amused. "Oh, you're not kidding, ah yes, I go to all their games I can."

"Did you play soccer?"

Kim shrugged, "A little, but I, needless to say was a basketball player. These ladies are pretty good players."

Kerry almost nodded bemusedly, "So, you only go because of the great soccer they play?"

One side of Kim's mouth edged into a smirk, "Welll... that isn't the only reason."

Kerry shook her head, "Two days, seven a.m., Central School."

Kim inclined her head, "Thank you."

It was Kerry's turn to shrug, "Without you... I'd have to move the set myself, that wouldn't happen easily."


	3. Chapter Two

Kerry walked into the school building, mumbling, "She couldn't have done this at a reasonable hour, no, she has to be the one person in Chicago who's a morning person." She was so intent on venting to no one that she didn't notice Kim until she had slammed very hard into her and wound up on her butt looking up into Kim's concerned blue eyes. As Kim looked down Kerry blushed red. "Guess I wasn't looking where I was going."

Kim almost managed to hide her smirk as she hauled Kerry to her feet. "That was quite obvious. So, I take it you haven't morphed into a morning person?"

"Ah, no."

Maggie glided into the room, before anything else could be said by either woman. "Hello you two. Isn't this a beautiful morning. I can smell change on the air. Should we get started?"

Kim shrugged and Kerry narrowed her eyes at Maggie. "Shouldn't there be more people here Maggie?"

"Just you two. Because I'm not going to have you two up there screwing up the production because you're only pretending you like each other."

With that, she left the two women looking a bit confusedly at each other. They were silent, "I'm just glad I don't have to do the make-up for this. Turn someone into... the Beast. I'm more a writer type. Probably because of how much I have to BS on all the reports I send to Robert."

Kim looked interested. "You write? What? Poems, novels, short stories? I've always tended towards the visual end of the arts myself." Kim laughed to herself, "My parents could never keep my hands out of the paint as a kid. They finally just replaced all the water colors with finger paints, but I was a well colored clam no matter the kind of paint. I... uh, did finally grow out of the finger paints."

Kerry smiled at that, "I can see that. The finger painting. Have you done it in a while, with a brush or pencils I mean?"

Kim shook her head, "Painted, drawn, no, I haven't had time. I went from college where I had at least a few minutes a day to be artistic to Med School, where if I didn't study twenty four hours a day I would fall behind. Then I had my intern year, and then my residency, and then I became an Attending, and then came to County. Since I wanted to make a good impression I worked a lot of double shifts until..."

Kerry pursed her lips, "You can say it Kim, until we had a relationship which I totally sabotaged because I was too stupid to see that I didn't have to come out to be able to defend you."

Kim blinked a few times, "That wasn't what I was... I haven't really been inspired since college." She paused, "Kerry, what do you write?"

"Different things, poems, short stories, I've tried a novel, I'm good at the beginning and the end, I'm not so good at the middle. But I haven't had time either... Actually..." Kerry glanced down at her watch, "I'm on in a short while, but I..."

Kim smiled, "You like to get there ten, twenty, thirty minutes early. No one has convinced you that work isn't like a Mob Meet, you don't have to get there early to get the drop on everyone else?" Kerry stayed silent, so Kim kept talking, "Well, I think that we can not kill each other right?" There was a challenge that was issued when their eyes met. They had danced around what had happened to the two of them that May day two years ago.

Kim had lived her life, moved on with her life, gone out on dates, had mostly unattached sex and hung out with family and friends.

Kerry had moved on with her life as well, she had worked, eaten, slept and written. What she had told Kim wasn't totally true. She had written more in the past two years than ever before. "Kiss you, fuck you, strangle you on occasion, but I have never wanted to kill you."

Kim chuckled and stood as Kerry rose. "Would you mind if I accompany you on the El? I also have to get to work, and what the hell, it doesn't hurt to be early. Might give our office assistant a bit of a mild heart attack, and keep everyone on their toes." 

Before they could get out the door Maggie blocked it. "Now, where do you think you're going?"

Kerry put a hand up, "Look, we've decided we'll be fine and we both want to be on time for work." Kim raised an eyebrow at Kerry's statement, but could see the twinkle in Kerry's eyes, so stood silently behind the redhead and watched to see if Maggie would object.

She didn't, but just moved to one side. "I hope you're right..." She continued into the room and Kerry and Kim's bemused gazes met.

oOOOOo

It had been a long day. Kim threw her jacket aimlessly at her coat rack. She missed. For a long moment she stared at it and finally shook her head and left it there. She was just into the living room when her phone rang. She collapsed into her sofa before she answered it. "Hello..." She sighed, "Hey Mom... not tonight, it's been a long, long day... No, I know that, but I just need a night alone."

Kim closed her eyes as her mother kept talking. Finally she interrupted her. "I need to go, okay. Sorry... yeah, I love you too Mom. Give Dad a kiss from me..."

She hung up and sat there. After a few minutes she stretched over to her end table and pulled over an orange notebook still encased in plastic. She splayed her hand on the cover and just stared down at it. She ripped the plastic open and flipped to the first page. She reached over for a pencil and started drawing.

oOOOOo

Kerry sat at her desk. Nothing. She'd been sitting in front of the blank sheet for almost an hour. Less than an hour with Kim had apparently made her brain dry up.

She finally sighed and stood, threading her arm through her crutch and going towards her bedroom. It was quiet. She sighed, "I need a dog or something."


	4. Chapter Three

Kerry and Kim both went a whole week trying not to think of the other. Kim was practiced at putting women out of her mind. And Kerry, for once, was happy that the week had been hell in the ER. Everything from hundreds of people who had used a bad suntan lotion to the fact that Romano had taken a renewed interest in the ER, her ER.

But Kerry wasn't in the ER. She was at a full cast rehearsal waiting for a late Kim and putting together the props for the musical. She jumped as Kim spoke from behind her. "Long week?" Kerry leaned heavily against her crutch as she walked between the plastic containers. Kim picked up a sheet of paper. "So, full cast rehearsal, are we ready for that?"

"Don't need to be. No props or costumes yet. Are you all set there?"

Kim's eyes widened, "What is here, I..."

Kerry gestured towards the stage, "I have to get up there, figure out who the hell is going where and how to get stuff where it's supposed to go. There are the lists for each scene, for each act, there's the stuff. Order the things into the boxes according to the list."

With that Kerry disappeared out of the balcony area. Kim worked for a bit, shooting glances down at the stage. She didn't see Kerry.

From behind her she heard a grumble. Kim turned, "Haleh, how did Maggie convince you to help?"

Haleh batted at a foofy dress and almost tripped over a wad of fur. "We won't talk about it. How are you Kim?"

Kim turned away from the stage, "I'm doing okay. I've never done this before, so, a little out of my comfort zone."

Haleh chuckled, "You mean to tell me that there's something you're not good at?"

Kim shook her head and turned back towards the stage. On stage Kerry and Maggie stood, obviously arguing. "There are so few places she looks at home, I never knew that on stage, or, behind the scenes of the stage was one of them. Has she really been as bad as everyone have been saying?"

Haleh joined Kim in front of the balcony. "Probably worse."

"Do you know why?"

Haleh looked over at Kim, "You mean, was it you?" Kim looked at Haleh with a stunned look on her face. "She doesn't know I know Kim, and no, I don't get that feeling. It feels deeper than that. Family maybe?"

"They died. I'm pretty sure they died."

"I don't know." Haleh shook her head, "I don't know, she's always been private, that hasn't changed. We all guess because we're nosy, but only Kerry knows what's really wrong. It's good that you're here... we could use you at County you know. The others from the Psych floor are okay, but you were great."

Haleh didn't wait for an answer, but left Kim alone on the balcony.

oOOOOo

"He's going to like it, right?"

Randi sighed, "He'll love it Dave, please, stop obsessing."

Dave looked both ways. "I'm makin' a fool out of myself, so Nick needs to like it."

Randi patted Dave on the shoulder. "We'll be great Dave. Don't worry about, your kid's 6 right?" Dave nodded, "He'll love it... and incoming."

Kerry appeared as if from thin air, "David, Randi, get back to work."

Dave opened his mouth, but as Randi caught his eyes it snapped closed, he grabbed a chart and skedaddled.

"Randi..."

Before Kerry had a chance to even begin her thought the radio went off and Abby answered it. "Everyone whirled into action. "Where's Pratt?"

Pratt appeared, "Sorry... I..."

"No excuses, you're with Susan, Gallant, with me... Where's Carter?"

oOOOOo

"Sylvia is there... Oh, look, it's a ghost from my past. I'm going to guess and say that you're not here for a check up Carl?"

Carl gestured towards Kim's office. "Could we?"

Kim sighed, but nodded. "Sylvia... when my next appointment gets here, you'll tell me."

Sylvia grinned a bit, "Immediately Doctor Legaspi."

Kim followed her former boss into her office. "What do you want Carl, I'm not coming back."

"You miss it."

Kim sat down in her chair, leaving Carl standing, "Of course I miss it Carl, but sometimes I also miss the freedom of being a child, that doesn't mean I want to go through my childhood again. I can't leave."

"I talked to Sylvia, you're just an employee Kim. You can leave at any time."

"I'm not talking contractually, I..."

Carl interrupted Kim, something he rarely did. "Just think about it. You won't be fired. You won't be harassed."

"You can't promise that Carl. Is Romano still in charge?"

"Yes, but..."

Kim stood, "I need to get ready for my next patient."

"Kim..."

"Carl..."

oOOOOo

Kerry sat on the couch in the lounge and took long breaths in and let them out just as slowly. Abby poked her head in. "Doctor Weaver."

Kerry looked up, "Is... Corey's mother here?"

Abby nodded, "Yeah, just got here. You okay?" Kerry frowned, "No, I don't mean in the grand scheme. Your hip."

"You got the short straw, to come in here, ply me with drugs to defuse me?"

Abby smirked, "Yep. But, in my defense, you were limping."

"I was born with Congenital Hip Dysplasia, I wasn't born in the US, hell, I wasn't really born in what most people would call civilization, though I have to say, it was a lot less damn difficult for me in those days. Anyway, it didn't get fixed."

Abby frowned, "Couldn't they now? Hip replacement?"

"I'm... I'm not ready for that yet. Did you bring any Ibuprofen?"

Abby presented it to the red head. "Did you know this woman and child who came in?"

"Not really, I treated the mother, Sarah, for a bum knee the other day. The other mother and the kid, Corey, were there too, and now... she's dead, just like that."

"Makes you think about life." Abby paused significantly, "Love."

Kerry finally looked up at the nurse. "Why Kim, explain that to me Abby. Why am I stuck on her? We broke up, in spectacular fashion. There's no way that she feels the same way about me."

"Eh, I've seen worse."

"That makes me feel so much better, really."

Abby shrugged and sat back, "I don't know. You're short, she's tall. You're a nerd, she's cool, redhead, blonde? When you're in the same room it just seems like you're the same person, like you're two halves of something bigger."

"That doesn't make a relationship Abby."

"I know, trust me, I know."


	5. Chapter Four

Backstage was exploding with action. People were moving things, talking, putting on their make-up, costumes. Kim had never seen anything like it. And then, the redhead was in front of Kim and yanking her behind a set piece that didn't go on stage until the second act. 

She dove in with no preamble. "I try not to remember my school age years. No one ever tried to befriend me, to see why I had a crutch, I never even got a question about it. I was simply avoided like the plague, no one cared enough to tease, or... or whatever. In high school it got bearable, everyone was going through their own crap. And then there was the Drama Club, some of them tried to be weird, and I didn't even have to try. People talked to me, and if I was careful I was just like them for a time. By college it was better, a bigger place, no peer pressure, I was at the top of my class, I could interact with Professors, who... they were my salvation, the pursuit of knowledge fueled my life, and so I cut out the middleman and I learned to only give the world my skills, my brain. I have destroyed many relationships because of this. Because I didn't see how they... I was never good enough, I... my own mother didn't want me..."

Kim started to speak, but didn't, as she realized that Kerry wasn't done. Kerry took a breath and looked up, "But then, I met you, maybe it was because you were a woman, you'd be the one to tell me that... or, I don't know, but I fell through all my hang ups. You blew through all my walls. You didn't see my crutch, it was just... it was just me as much as my arm, or my heart is. When you look, looked into my eyes I was new, I was six years old at my first day of school, and instead of the coolest kid in the class bumping into me on the way to the food, she came up to me and swept me off my feet with a guerilla kiss... uh..."

Kim chuckled, "Bad analogy?"

Kerry shrugged, "But, I'm scared. It truly isn't about being gay, you have to believe that. It's the fact that it's work. It... because you're right, you should..."

"We..."

"Work is what I am, if I throw this in, I don't... I don't know if I can face them everyday. Private is supposed to be... private..."

"You could."

Kerry frowned, "What?"

Kim gripped Kerry's hands in her own, "You are the strongest woman I have ever met. Damn Kerry, all you ever see is the things you get wrong, all you ever see is what you think are your... shortcomings." Kim shook her head, "Sometimes you surprise me in such... You can be in horrible pain, and no one can tell. You've stood up to Romano on a daily, sometimes hourly basis for how many years. But all you see is the one time when you were tired, when you were scared, and you didn't bitch him out on my behalf. You didn't get me suspended Kerry, you didn't get me fired Kerry, he did that all by himself. Hell Kerry, every day you do what's best for the ER and you don't expect to ever be thanked." Kim let go and took a step back, "You can handle anything, of that, I'm sure."

Kerry looked down at her watch, "Ah, it's ten minutes 'til curtain." She slid by Kim and picked up her headset and battery pack from the table. Putting one on her head and the other on her belt, and spoke, "We need everyone backstage, in the common area. So, if anyone's having naked, pre-show sex back there, put on some clothes."

Kim frowned, "Pre-show sex? Why has no one explained this to me before." 

Kerry looked over at Kim with a smile as she flipped off her headset. "You really never dated a proper Drama Club nerd in high school did you?"

Kim shook her head, "So, what are we doing now?"

Kerry glanced over at Kim for a long moment and held out her hand. "I'll show you... something I did before every show in high school. You'll like it, it's all warm and fuzzy..."

Kim rolled her eyes and let herself be pulled farther backstage.

oOOOOo

"Whoooo!!!!"

Kerry smiled as Kim pin wheeled around the parking lot. It was empty, because Kim had stayed helping Kerry with the last of the clean-up. "So, you had fun?"

Kim swooped in and picked up Kerry, whirling her in a circle. She put the red head back down, but didn't let go of Kerry. "This was so unlike anything I've done before. It was like... like..." Kim didn't think, but bent down and captured Kerry's lips with her own and kissed the hell out of the shorter woman. Kerry offered no resistance and kissed right back.

They finally parted, but not quickly. Kerry took a step back and out of Kim's arms. "This is a bad idea."

"So are cheese doodles, but I love them, even when I have to spend a whole day cleaning the results off my furniture. I'm not saying it will work, but, at least we can try? Maybe friends?"

Kerry raised an eyebrow, "You often kiss you friends like that?"

Kim inclined her head, "Point taken. More than friends... a date. We both go to our corners after it, re-evaluate and go from there."

"One date?" Kim nodded, "No pressure?" Kim nodded, "How 'bout tonight?"

oOOOOo

Kim laughed, "He really said that?"

Kerry shook her head, "I couldn't believe it either, but he did."

"And other than... randy furries. How are you?"

Kerry frowned, "You mean, why do I look like hell? Why am I throwing myself into work, being an alpha bitch at work? I thought you knew me better than that? But then, you want to know if it's you?"

"I..."

Kerry sighed, "To answer the last question first, no, I mean, figuring out that I like women, that, sometimes..." Kerry trailed off and let out a short laugh, "I tend to get tongue tied on dates with you Kim."

"At other times too."

"Kimberly."

Kim smiled, "Just take a breath and take your time. We know how to close down restaurants." Kerry smiled. "Take your time."

Kerry nodded. "Truthfully, not sleeping, feeling and looking like hell started two months ago. I've been looking for my birth parents on and off for years. Three months ago I thought I found them. I built it up again, I was excited for the first time since, well, the first time I thought I'd found my mother. And again, it wasn't them, it wasn't her. I guess I've sort of shut down since then. I have no family. My mother and father's family either don't know me, or are all dead, and after all these years I still haven't found... maybe I'm just supposed to be alone. I don't know who the hell I am, going with you, figuring out that I love women, that showed me that. So, there's why I'm being more bitchy and look like death warmed over."

Kim put her hands on top of Kerry's on the table. "Randi, Abby, even Dave. Me, and I have a frickin' hellishly big family. Two brothers, two sisters, three outta those four are married with kids of their own. I have Aunts and Uncles up the wazoo, and they're married with kids, and I have cousins, and second, third, fourth..."

"That doesn't count, they're your family. Hell, Randi, Abby, Dave, they're not even friends, they're my employees, the only ones who can stand me long enough to talk in complete sentences to my face."

"Why not? Didn't you tell me about a time when Randi defended you... literally by knocking a guy senseless? I've done that for my sisters. And Dave, I think his mother left much to be desired during his upbringing. I think that you're his mother figure and the only way he knows how to deal with a mother figure is to annoy the hell out of her."

Kerry groaned, "God, I hope you're wrong there." Kim chuckled and gave Kerry's hands a pat. She started to pull away, but Kerry wouldn't let her. "I don't know if I can do this, or do it well, or at all. But... thank you for giving me a second chance."

Kim smiled and brought Kerry's hand to her lips, feathering a kiss on it. "You're giving me one as well love. Slowly..."

"Slowly..."


	6. Chapter Five

"You look better Doctor Weaver."

Kerry glanced around the admit desk, "No Maggie lurking anywhere to pull me into some other scheme?" There was a round of heads shaking no.

Randi waited, but Kerry stopped talking. "That's it?"

Kerry shrugged, "Uh, yes? Was there something else?"

"I just, I can't deal with this anymore Doctor Weaver."

Kerry looked up from her chart. "What? Randi..."

Randi shook her head and grabbed Kerry by the arms. "No, nope, no... you're missing the greatest thing that could ever happen to you, because, because you're scared out of your mind, I won't let you be got it... Fire me, hang me by my pinkies from the roof, I don't give a damn."

She yanked Kerry towards her, the red head's crutch clattered to the floor and then Randi was kissing Kerry, and the whole ER went silent. The patients, the doctors, PAs, nurses, visitors. And Kerry was kissing Randi, and then the plot thickened.

A throat cleared by the board and Kerry jerked backwards towards it. She tottered and was on her way to the floor and then she just, wasn't. It was the warmest feeling she'd had in two years. She was home, nothing could go wrong. She opened her eyes and found herself looking into deep pools of blue, seriously dilated blue. "Kim..."

Kim helped Kerry stand with a small smile and a cough. "Doctor Weaver. You're kissing on the job now?"

Kerry stared at Kim, she couldn't bring herself to look anywhere else, but this meant that Kim could see the emotions as they flew across Kerry's face. There was horror, and relief, and confusion, then it all seemed to shut off. "What are you doing here Kim?"

Kim shook her head, "I work here, again..."

Kerry shook her head, "Just when I'd thought you were smarter than that..."

"You still work here..."

Kerry looked around, "Yes, well, I gotta give this place a little diversity right? Handicapped and gay, two boxes, no waiting..."

Kerry's words hung in the air of the ER for a long moment before Dave broke the silence, slapping Kerry on the back, "Hey I'm al..."

"Dave..." Kerry held her index finger up, "Bad idea." She glanced around, "Well, what's everyone waiting for, people are bleeding, get back to work..."

And Kerry somehow managed to keep the stunned look off her face as they did just that. Kim smiled softly and took a step closer to Kerry, taking one of the redhead's hand's in her own. "The world is still spinning, the sun'll go down tonight and come back up tomorrow."

Kerry shook her head and gently extracted her hand. "I'm still not comfortable with..."

"PDAs at work?"

"Something like that, yes..."

Kim paused for a long moment before she gripped her hands behind her back. "I... I can do that."

"Slowly..."

Kim raised an eyebrow, "But not too slowly..."

Kerry chuckled.

"You're not going to fire Randi are you?"

Kerry glanced over at the clerk, who was doing her best to look innocent, and busy. "No, I'm considering killing her though..."


End file.
